10 Most EPIC Hockey Mullets in NHL History
This post is brought to you by the official Checking Line Store - GRINDER THREADS. With only one week left in our February sale check out the SHOP and use the coupon code “checkingline” for 10% off your order.
For better or worse the mullet is arguably one of the most celebrated hair styles of the past 20 years. While typical follicular trends come and go, the mullet is more than a haircut. It’s a lifestyle. Finely tuned by the “10-90” formula (10% “business” in the front, 90% “party” in the back), the mullet’s versatility is unsurpassed.
When it comes to professional sports, the coveted hockey mullet transcends all others. Part aerodynamics, part ‘flow’, and 100% hilarity – the hockey mullet is an entrenched emblem of the glory days of the sport.
Fire up your can of mousse and dust of your hair spray. It’s time to count down the 10 most epic hockey mullets of all time.
10. “The Sucker Punch” – Marty McSorley
Back in the 90’s there was no cooler place to play hockey than Los Angeles. Aluminum Easton sticks glistened in the stadium lights, Hollywood A-listers frequented the front row, and McSorley’s well conditioned blonde mullet flowed gingerly behind him as he plowed down the ice. While a cowardly sucker punch on Brashear in 2000 shines most brightly in the history books of Marty’s career, his famous hockey mullet is a close second.
9. “The Duster” – George Parros
George Parros – perrenial tough guy of the Anaheim Ducks – pushes the innovative boundaries of hockey mullets. While a little flow in the back is a powerful force on it’s own, add a finely manicured moustache to the mix and what do you get? Pure multitude.
8. “The Howitzer” – Al Iafrate
One of the main factors forcing mullets into retirement is male pattern baldness. For Al Iafrate, however, this unfortunate genetic curse left him undeterred in his allegiance to the mullet. Through thick and thin Al charged forward to sculpt an unprecedented “skullet” – one of the rarest hockey mullets ever to be seen in the wild. Check-mate, Chara.
7. “The Linesman” – Patrick Kane
While Patrick Kane was almost disqualified from the roster due to his lack of authenticity and commitment, his 2010 playoff mullet was hard to leave off of the list. In a stroke of pure genius Kane pushed hockey mullet styling to new heights with his finely carved ‘triple lines’. To the uneducated mullet laymen this witty addition may appear to be a simple comedic afterthought. To the hockey mullet connoisseur, however, this attention to detail is exactly the kind of innovation deserving of number 7 on the roster.
6. “The Shutout” – Roberto Luongo
Proving that tenders can rock a mullet just as good as their more fleet footed teammates – Luongo keeps the mullet tradition alive with a pure grease bucket. It’s hard to imagine the globs of gel that Luongo must lather into his mullet before a game, but the added weight has hardly impacted his game. Roberto continues to top the league as one of the best goalies in the NHL. Is the mullet merely a coincidence to his success? Think again.
5. “The Fleur-de-lis” – Guy Lafleur
Guy “The Flower” Lafleur is known for much more that the record for most assists in Habs history. While 80’s hair bands made mullets en vogue, Lafleur is quite possibly the first player to put hockey mullets on the map. Like a blurred comet re-entering the atmosphere, Guy’s mullet glided down the right wing like no other in the game.
4. “The Play-by-Play” – Brian Engblom
While Canadians are served with the “wisdom” of Don Cherry in-between periods, hockey fans down South are not as lucky. Former NHLer turned resident hockey expert on the “Versus” hockey network, Brian Engblom has not let a move to the broadcast booth deter the virtues of his mullet prowess. Best appreciated in 1080p HD this masterpiece holds true to the ‘business in the front, party in the back’ mantra unique to the mullet. Don Cherry you just got one-upped….mullet style.
3. “The Slot” - Ryan Smyth
Ryan Smyth is best known for his ruthless play in front of the crease. Hated amongst defensemen throughout the league, there are few lengths that Smyth will not go through to wreak havoc on opposing goaltenders. This fearlessness even carries through to his choice of haircut. More than just style, Smyth’s mullet fully expanded provides a unique function when laying down screens in front of the net. With a radius of 8 inches (fully extended), try seeing past that mullet spread.
2. “The Jofa” - Jaromir Jagr
Every so often a mullet comes along that truly defies time. While it is often said that hockey will only have one ‘Wayne Gretzky’, the same can be said for Jagr’s epic locks. A true mullet pioneer Jagr pushed the limits of his Jofa, packing pure volume into his magnificent mane.
1. “The Enforcer” - Chris Simon
Chris Simon is famous for two things in his mulletrious 15 year NHL hockey career: kicking ass and rocking one of the most feared mullets in the game. While getting your clock cleaned is bad enough, it’s made even worse when you look up off the ice with those rugged layers of flow staring you in the face. While most will remember Simon for his 1,824 career PIMs, we’ll remember him for what truly matters. His epic hockey mullet.
***Don’t forget that the final week of the Grinder Threads sale is upon us. If you haven't yet, head over to our SHOP and use the code "checkingline" for a 10% discount.